Burnt Soup Tonight

Kindergarten

Maddie started Kindergarten.  It has been strange especially the new sleep schedule, which she is getting down better then I thought.  The day before school started we let Maddie pick out a new dress and accessories.  We got her hair cut and took her to do something fun for her last day of summer.  She chose to go to the movie theater.  We went and saw Nancy Drew, which Maddie absolutely loved.  We plan on starting the books now.  I was surprised when she passed out at 7:30.  The following day we all got up about 6 and started her first day.  Jake made her pancakes and bacon, Which he hand fed her.  I dressed her and curled her hair.  We packed her lunch and we where off, to her first day of kindergarten.  We panicked a little fighting the traffic, We wanted to get there early to take a few pictures.  We said goodbye after a few pictures and kisses. 

We did rather well as parents sending our first child to kindergarten.  Until we where driving on our way to the back to school breakfast at church.  We where listening to KLove and Jon Rivers read this story.

Dear world,

I bequeath to you today one little girl in a crisp dress , two twinkling eyes and a happy laugh that ripples all day long and a flash of shiny hair that bounces in the sun when she runs. I trust you’ll treat her well. She’s slipping out of the back yard of my heart this morning and skipping off down the street to her first day of school and never again will she be completely mine. Frail and proud she’ll wave her young and independent hand this morning and say “Good Bye” and walk with little lady steps to the school house. Now she’ll learn to stand in lines and wait by the alphabet for her name to be called. She’ll learn to tune her ears for the sounds of school bells and deadlines and she’ll learn to giggle and gossip and look to the ceiling in a disinterested way when the little boy across the isle sticks out his tongue at her. And now she’ll learn to be jealous and now she’ll learn how it feels to be hurt inside now she’ll learn how not to cry. No longer will she have time to sit on the front porch steps on a summer day and watch an ant scurry across the crack in the side walk. Nor will she have time to pop out of the bed with the dawn and kiss the lilac blooms in the morning dew. No, now she’ll worry about those important things. Things like grades, and which dress to wear and whose best friend is whose. The books and learning will replace the blocks and dolls. Now she’ll find new heroes. For 5 full years now, I’ve been her sage and Santa clause and pal and playmate and father and friend. Now she’ll learn to share her worship with her teachers which is only right but no longer will I be the smartest greatest man in the whole world. Today when that school bell rings for the first time she’ll learn what it means to be a member of a group with all of its privileges and disadvantages too. She’ll learn in time that proper young ladies do not laugh out loud or kiss dogs or keep frogs in pickle jars in bedrooms or even watch ants scurry across cracks in sidewalks in the summer. Today she’ll learn for the first time that all who smile at her are not her friends and I’ll stand at the front porch and watch her start out on that long lonely journey to becoming a woman. So world I bequeath to you today one little girl in a crisp dress with two twinkling eyes and a flash of hair that bounces in the sunlight when she runs. I trust you’ll treat her well.

We cried and cried.  Because this is a big step in becoming less innocent.  Will she still think we are the greatest things ever or will her friends take that place someday.  I just pray that she never loses her passion for god.  If she never looses that, well then I am ready for her to be turned loose into this world.  I just hope in the 5 years when she was completely just Jake and I's, that we prepared her enough and loved her enough to face the hardships of this world. 

When we returned to eat lunch with her, she was as happy as can be. She acted as if she new exactly what she was doing and she was a natural.  All I can say is at the end of the day, I was just thrilled that she was as excited to see us as I was to see her.  Everyday this week when she sees my face at the end of school it lights up and she gets excited.  And that very small thing is what lights my life and gives me all I need to keep trying and keep loving in this imperfect world.  I love you Maddie.  God speed as you take your new journey in life.

Texas Toads!!!

If my girls could say one thing they love about Texas it would be the toads that come out after the rain.  Since we have hit record rain fall this year, there have been plenty.  My girls have always enjoyed catching bugs, in fact Maddie had at one time created a Rollie Pollie zoo.  She had some Rollie Pollies as giraffes, some as penguins.....it was great!  But Nicole and Maddie's Favorite thing to catch now is toads.  The only problem is Maddie gets attached and wants to keep her toads.  Every night the sofa of "Let the toads go" begins.  The other night, she tried to sneak a toad to Grandmas house, which is an 8 hour drive.  My favorite is when Jake convinced her that the toad had babies to get home to.  She say, "How do you know."  Jake told her the toad had nipples. So she agreed to let it go.  Nicole is good about it, she usually catches them torchers them for awhile, playful torcher, and then lets them go.  Maddie is a lot like me when I was a kid, the more pets, the happier the girl.  i have to admit it is hilarious when she makes them dance with their bow legs. Here are some pics of the girls, they are hot and flushed from catching toads.

Texas we still are..And it's a Girl.

Looking at my last post, I realize I am behind again.  It is a girl, Jakes hopes have come true.  He wants another girl.  How could you not when you have Maddie to remind you how wonderful they are.  Jake has had the name Jocelin picked out for years.  And though it means little goth, I suppose it fits since she is due on Halloween.  It is a medieval name that comes from the tribe of the gautes.  Jake has his heart set on it.  i am now 7 months along.  And cooky as I'll get.  The hormones are really getting to me, I have been extra sad and extra mean.  Besides all that and a little morning sickness, I think I am doing Okay.   Here she is!!!!

Well a lot has been going on since we left the hotel.  We moved into a pretty nice home, I can't complain.  It is a very nice neighborhood as well.  There is a pool and playground just across the street. We found an excellent church and Jake is preparing to try out for the worship team soon.  Maddie loves her Teacher at church and everything about it.  She is always very excited to go.    Jake is really getting settled in his job and loves it.  He had a struggle in the beginning with feeling comfortable, he was not familiar with web.  With much prayer god has calmed him and opened his mind to find the answers he needs. 

Maddie is loving Texas,  Thank goodness.  She had a very hard time in the beginning.  Her sister is currently here which has made things easier and she loves the new house and neighborhood.  She is signed up for Kindergarten.  She will also be involved with dance and karate soon.  It will be hard for her all over again when Nicole returns to Holland.  It is a hard situation for all of us.  We just need to hold fast to God to get through it.  Overall I think we are going to make it, especially if I can get through this pregnancy.

Texas here we are!!

Wow it is funny to read my last post not knowing what I know now.  Yes..God will provide.  And why not, he knows I love and trust him.  Well here we are in Texas.  Beautiful San Antonio Texas.  How...well God answers prayers when you leave it in his hands.  When Jake didn't get the raise he wanted at Linux,  he put resumes out.  We prayed and left it up to God.  Knowing I can't work when this baby arrives, god gave Jake a 18,000 dollar raise with a new job in Texas.  With Nicole moving to Holland, we knew it was where god wanted us....oh and the crappy weather in Utah made it easier.  So far we are in love with San Antonio.  It is wonderful and there is so much to do.  Madelynn misses things as I do as well back in Utah.  But we know this is where we need to be.  Things will be a lot easier once we are out of this hotel and into our new home.  Once we are more settled Maddie will forget the things she left behind and move on to her new life. 

So far my pregnancy has been okay.  We had a scare with my heart.  I have some sinus tachycardia, but the cardiologist seems to think it is just from retaining so much fluids during pregnancy.  They are doing all kinds of tests to rule out anything more serious.  It has been scary, but things are looking better. Maddie talks to the baby everyday, she is more excited then anyone.  This baby is going to be looking for big sister when it is born.  She kisses my belly and tells the baby secrets.  She wants a boys so bad.  oh she even keeps Jake in line, making sure he waites on me day and night.  She can be quite nasty when Jake says no or why can't you do it .  Maddie yells  "she's pregnant!" She is very nasty about the way she says it to him.  It makes him so mad and it makes me laugh.  Oh I love my tough little Maddie with a heart of gold.  I am so happy that she is old enough to really be excited about this baby.  I am so blessed by God.  I can't stop praising his name.  Thank you lord!!!!!

God Answers 4 year olds

So.....I am pregnant.  And as everyone knows it was the work of a 4 year old.  Maddie prays every night and day, that I will get pregnant.  Me on the other hand if I do I do, if I don't I don't.  God made it clear to everyone that this is an answer to Maddie's Prayer, by making the due date October 31st.  I am worried and excited all at the same time.  I can't wait to have another little one to feal my life with more joy and cuteness, but I don't know how we will afford to live without me working.  I am very scared.  I guess I have to trust in the lord, because this is his will and he will help us through. 
Well Maddie is as cute as ever, When I told her the news she said,  "I hope we have a black baby."  I told her probebly not going to happend and that it is her dads fault for not being black.  I told her the baby could be grey though. 
She has come up with quite a few fun names for the baby, like halloween cat or Happy Halloween.  My favorite was the letter B, she said lets name the baby the letter "B".  Prince Philup or princess Aurora.  Oh she though it it was down right silly, that I suggested Chippy.
All and all we are all very excited, Jake even called up everyone, before we where even certain.  SO far I have been okay, a little more tired and extremly gassy (it must be Jake's clone.)

The Rest of the Year

Well, It is January 2nd 2007.  Yep 2006 has ended and had I updated my credit card info I would be kept up on my blog.  I guess I will have to Review the months I skipped and vow never to let it go this long again.....ha we will see, this is me we are talking about.
September.....Maddie still in school, Me on the other hand I started a new job.  We really needed the money and I think I wanted the new challenge and excitement of the fast paced lifestyle.  But it has been hard.  Although I love my job, I really could not have asked for a more relaxing job, the hours are hard.  I am a night owl anyway, but I usually use to sleep in with Maddie and get enough rest.  Now I work 12AM to 7Am and I try to stay up until Jake gets off work.  It has been a challenge.  I feel like now I have no time for anything and less time with Maddie.  I am trying to keep the house clean and spend quality time with Maddie.  The bad thing is, I think I have been much more short with everyone, do to the unnatural schedule and my body is under stress.  I think even my PMS is worse.  And my family is getting the bunt end of my off scheduled body and mind trying desperately to adjust.  I just can't seem to find a schedule that sticks. 
I can't let go of this job. Jake and I like I said desperately need the extra money.  And I afraid if I do I will loose one of the best jobs.  So I endure and one day we will figure it all out.
I can't really think of anything completely interesting about September. Except that I love September.  The Fall is my most favorite season.
October......I love October and can you guess who else does????  Maddie!!....It is her most favorite time because it is Halloween.  We usually spend the last week or two indulging in Halloween events.  We always every year visit barn yard boo, which is a Halloween event at the petting zoo.  This year I am afraid, was to cold. We did have a few warm days.  We did get to do other fun things. We went to the party at the Rec center and trick-or-treated and had sloppy joes.  Maddie was invited to a party at her friend Mathews house.  She had a Halloween party at school.  On Halloween Day, we went to My husbands work and trick or treated from cubical to cubical.  We have always trick-or-treated at novell, but this was the first year we did it at Linux Networx.  I am grateful we got to.  Maddie was of course a Halloween Cat.  I went over board this year, trying to find something more fun then a plain Black cat.  So I found a boa and mask and Ears with curly Hair and Called her Diva Cat.  Maddie couldn't handle all the accessories, So I ended up with the Mask and Boa.  Maddie ended up with a lot of Candy and so did Jake and myself.  I am hoping we can put a few more events in next year.  Hopefully some warmer weather.  We did Paint pumpkins, but it was earlier in the month.  Here is a picture of Maddie and I all Kittied up. 

November....All is good, All my Christmas shopping for the girls was done.   Maddie by this point is fighting me to go to school.  Her teacher had a baby and I don't think she liked the sub.  By now she knows her entire Alphabet....Yea!!!!! She is now bringing books home to read.  The only problem is she hates to read them.  What do I do????   I still do not know what to do.  But I make another vow to nip this one in the butt soon.  Her writing is getting better and better and she loves to write, so I figure if I spell to her a lot and she writes it, then maybe, she will pick up on some form of reading that way.  I know I will find some way to deal with this.
So here is a new funny yet not so funny new thing.  Maddie has fallen in love with the computer, but mainly a game called Zoo tycoon.  The funny thing is, I use to play Zoo Tycoon all the time When I was pregnant.  But Maddie is obsessed.  I really mean obsesses. The first thing out of of her mouth in the morning is. Can I play Zoo Tycoon?   She has learned a lot form the game, but it really has been a tuft obsession to wean.  Though because of the love for the game she has learned much about the computer in general. 

Jake went to Germany for work over thanksgiving and we missed him gravely, but we spoke to him on a program called skpe.  You can see and hear the person clear from the other side of the world through the computer.  Maddie is able to get on to the program and dial up her dad. Many times she would do this while it was his bedtime in Germany and wake him in the middle of the night.  At first she had to show me how to use the program.  She remembers things well. 

Jake had set up a pass word for each girls accounts on the computer.  They thought it would be neat to have one.... So Jake thought it would be easier for Maddie to have the password be a single letter, so it became M.  Maddie decided she wanted her entire name as the password.  She remembered how her dad had gotten into the account and tried to change her password, but instead ended up changing my user name on my account.  Ha ha.....she is getting close.  That stinker is smarter then she leads on.

Well December was great, lots and lots of snow for the holiday.  We did all the great Christmas things.  We went and saw the lights at festival of lights.  We made lots of Christmas goodies.  We took the girls on the polar express again this Christmas.  The polar express is a train called the Heber creeper (a train that takes scenic trips through Provo canyon.) During Christmas time, the train is calle the polar express.  We dress the girls in jamies and robes and enter the train, they read the book polar express and elves serve us hot co CO and Mrs. clause's Famous cookies.  When we reach the north pole, Santa enters the train and speaks with each child, then he gives them all a bell.  The way back, we let the girls open the first gift of Christmas and we sing carols all the way back to the train station.  It is very fun and magical for all of us. 

what was also neat about this season is the girls dance company performed the polar express.  Maddie's Creative class where bunnies and Nicole's class performed two dances, an elf jazz dance and a ballet performance.  It was so much fun. Maddie kept making up her own ending during the performances ***What a star she was***  Maddie's Picture had a lot of fuss,  It really did turn out beautiful.

We ended our Christmas vacation with sledding and strep throat. It was hard for me to get interested in work right away again. 

Feed the childrens Foundation

The face she is making reminds me of one of the children on Feed the Children Foundation.  She is Beautiful!!

Summer Comes to a Close

Well summer is ending.  Why do I say that in the middle of August, because the girls started school. It is great to have a few hours to my self each week to catch up on cleaning and internet surfing.  This really strange need to shop, shop, shop is driving me crazy.  Every year my parents always took us shoping for new clothes before school.  I think that is where I got it.  I wish I had the money to shop, shop, shop.  Summer was fun, I enjoyed my time with Nicole at the beginning and my special time with maddie towards the end.  Highlights would have to be our Trip to Florida of course.  Grandma Shauna's for the kids.  For me I have enjoyed hiking, walking, and loosing weight, whoo hoo!!  I have loved the hikes with my Dad and Step Mom.  Most of all the walks with my husband.  It seems like lately we have been falling in love all over again.  I love him so much.  We have been through so much garbage throughout our marriage and garbage that we still continue to deal with.  I sometimes wonder how we ever stand a chance with the odds against us.  It just doesn't seem fair that our marriage has come the hard way.  But it has come along and has grown more like steel.  I have to admit (getting back on the subject) that this has been an incredable summer.  I am really looking forward to the Fall, my favorite time of year. 

Catching up

I'm getting more and more behind on my posts!!  Well, it's mostly been Maddie and me.  Dads thrown in from time to time when he isn't busy at work.  Madelynn and I have been having a pretty great summer.  She has been miss hermit lately, she wants to just stay home and play with mom instead of friends.  I guess I better cherish these days now before she becomes a teenager, that never wants to be with mom.  I have been trying to get her out as much as possible.  My mother was in town the week before last, so Maddie had a fun time, besides tonsillitis she did get to go to the water park and Dinosaur museum.  This last week we had a lot of fun at the children's museum. It is one of the girls favorite places. There is so much to do that we always spend hours each time we go. We have had a pass for the last two years, so we have been there quite a bit.  Each time is always as fun as the last.  Though Nicole was not with us this last time, she enjoys the theater most of all.  They have a mini theater where you can dress up and put on plays.  Maddie loves it all.  They have a place where you can go grocery shopping, I think that is so neat.  There is so much to do there it is incredible.  I am grateful to live in such a child oriented state. There is always so much to do with the kids, I just wish it was all free, including lunch.  Here are a few pics from the museum.  We have been so many times, but I can't recall ever taking pictures. 

JUST A BUSY LIFE

Things have been busy and certainly crazy, with the evaluation going on.  Yesterday was our home evaluation.  That is when the evaluator comes to our home, checks out the house and watches our family together, how we interact.  I think it went quite well.  We had a great time.  We made cupcakes, which Maddie calls pup cakes.  We also finger painted.  We where sad to see Nicole go home for the rest of the summer.  We will not see her until school starts.  We where very blessed to have her for the last 5 and a half weeks. I hope this evaluation goes in our favorer.  It is all in gods hands now.  I love my girls and I just don't think I could bare them being split apart.  Today was a nice break from everything.  Besides Maddie having tonsillitis and a 104 degree temp the night before, it was a fun day. Maddie and I went to the Dinosaur museum with My mom, her boyfriend, and his son Lucas.  Lucas is ten and Maddie just thinks he is great as she does most boys. After spending a fantastic day with Maddie, I got to spend the rest of the evening with my husband, while Maddie spent the night with grandma at Rachael's house.  Jake and I spent most of the night talking and just enjoying one another's company.  Latter we caught a movie.  What a fantastic non stressful day. I am grateful for days like today. I needed it.